Afterbad Adjustments for Better Healing

Everyone has there own healing processes and this article is interesting perspective on improving your self healing processes.
Something which I should take more heart myself rather than always wondering what I did wrong. I have a few friends that have helped in self healing over the past few years in helping me understand that sometimes it wasn’t anything I did. I have one friend who is straight with me no matter what and that helps immeasurably.

On Thick Ice - The Spurious Imaginings of Reality

I know afterbad isn’t a real word, but this isn’t about the terrible, worst-day-of-your-life sort of “after”.  My focus here is on day-to-day troubles, the hurts and emotional bruises that tend to linger long after the moment itself.  There are two main elements to these pains, the failed expectation and the emotional response.  These, with practice, can be separated and adjusted to make the healing process take hours instead of days.

First let’s look at the failed expectation.  Whatever it was you thought was coming, from a simple “hello” to “I love you” to common courtesy, wasn’t what you experienced.  Chances are good that one of the reasons you feel hurt or angry is that you expected a certain behavior from someone and were treated rather differently, but not necessarily with the intent of hurting your feelings.  You may have misjudged the person’s motivation, character, mood, or maybe they are…

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